PMPA members have a great relationship with the Great Manufacturer at the North Pole. But we heard that it isn’t quite so nice for other folks who don’t make Santa’s “Nice” List.

A few ways you can tell if I hate your shop...

10. Santa leaves you a ribbon wrapped folder of jobs to bid. They are all cam-swiss jobs, lots of drilling and threading, and the materials are Waspaloy, Refractaloy 26, beta Titanium (Ti-3Al-13V-11Cr), and Pure Tungsten.

9. Santa drops off 10,000 bags of money. Unfortunately it is overstock of 2009 Zimbabwean currency and the total value of the $Z2,621,984,228 notes he left is a little less than $1. And their weight caves in the roof and mezzanine over your Q.A. Dept.

 8. Your P.O. for raw materials at firm pricing to North Pole comes back stamped, “Dream on, Chester!”

7. You ask Santa for a new order, what you really get is a new government regulation.

6. When Santa drops off your stuff, he also leaves a hefty bill for Air Freight and expedited (overnight) handling.

5. By the time Santa gets to your shop, all he has left on his sleigh is foam packing which he spills all over your parking lot as he overfills your dumpster while looking for that one box of special inserts he had on his list for you.

4. Week after Christmas you get a citation in the mail from the State Dept. Of Commerce. Seems their field guy caught Santa smoking on your premises.

3. Instead of “Naughty” or “Nice,” Santa has put you on the “Do Not Call” list.

2. Labels on all the packages Santa delivered read “Work in Process” not “Passed Q.C.”  And they are in tubs with red tags…

1. Santa tells your inside sales gal “If I wanted them Saturday, I would have ordered them Saturday!”

Scary Santa